My mom and dad have been divorced for a good many years now, 10 or more years, and in my eyes I am completely fine with it. If either of them are looking for a new relationship with different people I would not stand their way. I am 20 years old and honestly I could care less as long as they are both happy.
The problem however, is that my mom is acussing my dad of seeing a work friend of hers.
Now my mom "says" she is ok if my dad is seeing someone else but he should not look for a friend of hers.
I agree with her on this.
I also asked her "Why do you think that they are together?" and she said "my friend is reciving money to open a new shop and ur father was sad when I told him that shop wasn't doing too good"
I told her "well you can't just assume that he is giving her money just because he was sad that someone is about to lose their bussissness"
She didn't buy it.
I ask my dad, "are u seeing her friend?" and his reply is "No I am not."
My Dad isn't the lieing type, at least, I don't think he is.
My Mother also has no proof that they are together.
Now my Dad is finished with the relationship between him and my mother, claiming that he did not enjoy spending time with her and that the marriage was rushed. He has openly stated this to both me and my Mother.
My Mom on the other hand said that she does not care but at times (at least in my eyes) she appears that she still wants to get back together with him.
Things started to spiral downwords soon after, my mom and her friend became enemys because my mom would gossip about her saying how she is cheating with my Dad. Being accused of this and being gossiped about her friend started to strike back, making moans or kicking her heel whenever she was near my mom. This only caused my mom to get even more furious and more suspcious of my dad.
Now I do believe my dad is not seeing this woman because he is near his 60s and that woman is probably 30 at most. My Dad isn't particularly handsome nor is he a walking bank either. Doesn't wear any fancy clothes and drives a junkie so there is no way she would be with him for the looks//money.
I've also asked my Dad and he firmly said "No." and that he hasn't seen anyone after the divorce with my mother.
I tell my Mother this yet she still does not believe me nor him and goes on about this woman's moans and kicks.
I tell my mom that "she is trying to get you angry to get back at you for gossiping about her, calling her a prostitute"
She still does not believe me.
The situation was obviously affecting my mom since people started gossiping about her and this whole ordeal. She doesn't get enough sleep and her hair is all messed up when I see her, probably from the blacklash of the gossip war. Before she goes to work she still tries to look her best and she does a good job. It is a little strange watching her leave in the morning looking alright and coming back a bit of a mess.
The situation started to get the better of her though since she has gotten increasly mad and angry, s0tarting to yell at me about this woman. I ask her "What will Dad have to do in order for you to believe him."
My mother's reply was "Make him swear, a death swear, that he hasn't been with this woman"
I told my dad and he did not agree at first because he thought it outrageous but I told him "If u have not been with this woman why won't you say the swear?"
His reply was that "I would not swear that you (TRC) will die if I have been with this woman because that is outrageous but I will swear with my own life"
I thought it strange since if he really hadn't done it it wouldn't matter who's life was at stake but, at the very least, he would swear. My mother also didn't specifiy who's life so as long as it was a death swear, who cares.
My mom was reluctant to hear it but I finally got her into the same room as my dad and he said his part. After that they both left and it was a pretty non-violent and non-agressive encounter.
I then ask my mom "So do you believe it now?"
"No." she said shaking her head.
I was at a lost, it seemed that nothing in the world would make her see otherwise...
I then said to her "Mom, U and Dad's relationship is over, no matter what happens. It's finished. I think you can't accept this and then go on to acuss---"
"If I wanted to be with your dad I would be with him right now, I just don't want to" she interrupted
It was insensitive of me but I kept going
"you accuse ur friend and my dad of being together in order to cope with the fact that he does not want to be with you anymore, a sort of excuess as to why he is not with you."
My mom then said "I don't believe him." and I replyed "even though dad won't be with you you still got me right? I don't mind staying with you"
She smiled a bit and then said "I still don't believe him, in the swear he didn't specify which friend of mine" and I was like "no you can't say that because that is taking the situation out of context."
In the end she still seemed to be in disbelief but she was not as angry or as tense as before, still says she doesn't believe him, but definitely less tense; in fact the extreme opposite. She felt quite dead to me...
I am at a lost and I was wondering if you guys have any opinons as to what I can do. I know for a fact they will not see a counselor or some kind of physcologist since they are both pretty hard headed but I know I need to do something... or maybe just give her some time...
I don't know what to do at this point
