UGH..Anyone else having problems with purging?

I have been bulimic for the past 4 1/2 years...it use to be really hardcore to where i completely isolated myself and was purging over 6 times a day, but the summer of 2007 i "recovered". Now that I'm back in school and and doing "good" I can't tell anyone that I've relapsed, I refuse to disappoint everyone again. So basically I have to put on this fake smile for everyone, even my fucking therapist. I even fool myself most of the time into thinking that I'm ok. The only reason I ever stopped purging is because I take adderall so I won't eat past my comfort zone...but recently I've been purging again and I just don't know what to do anymore. Gosh i just need someone to talk to, I can't tell anyone this with out them freaking out. I ended up in the hospital the other night for dehydration which was I know was caused by the vomiting...I've been hospitalized for this a few times before but that was back in the early stages of recovery. I guess what really triggered this post is the fact that I ate pancakes this morning and when I went to purge hardly anything came out...and I cant exercise it off because I have really bad shin splints. I'm sitting here right now with all of those pancakes in me..its an unbearable thought. If it weren't for the fact that when I just got on the scale it said that I'm down a few pounds i may have had to end it all. Not really but sometimes I really feel like it. I feel like my body is still alive but I'm not...but that's probably because my medication has worn off ha. Anyway sorry for this rambling post...Oh and any suggestions on what to do about shin splints?

Stop purging, and eat.

If your purging because you think your not beautiful, thats just not true. I'm going to be frank here, some of the most beautiful women I have ever met were full figured healthy women. Allmost every one of my friends I have asked find the super skinny supermodel types as disgusting. Since I have no clue why you purge, I'm just guessing here it may actually be a different reason, but those pancakes won't kill you.

As for shin splints, you don't have to be standing to excercise. Get on your back and do a bycicle motion with your feet. That can be an aerobic type excercise and will get your heartbeat up. Do that for ten minutes then take a five minute break, then do it for another ten.

Honestly I just can't understand why you would do that to your body. It honestly pains me to see so many kids sit there and destroy themselves like that.

Keep your head up, and try your hardest to eat and keep it there.

what the dude above said basically, i dont understand it, and i dont get it, all i can say is, dont apologise for the ranting/rambling, thats what we are all here for ^_^

smile, everyones beautiful!

TFaith wrote:

what the dude above said basically, i dont understand it, and i dont get it, all i can say is, dont apologise for the ranting/rambling, thats what we are all here for ^_^

smile, everyones beautiful!

Your very perceptive, yes, I don't get it.


Shelby, could you explain to me maybe why you purge?

That could help me answer your questions better.

Not really, it makes me feel better i guess..anyway thanks for the advice.

Your like an addict very weak, turning to things to feel better. If you want to stop you need to become stronger. Then you'll realize you don't need to purge to be happy or to move on.


Oh and F*** no! I'm not going to give advice on shin splints. this thread seems like a cry for help or to get sympathy. Now I never purged and I don't know what you experience but I do know that's no life your living.

Brandon- You clearly have NO idea what I'm going through, what was the reason you even posted that comment? A cry for help? Yeah i guess so, me posting that was kind of a last resort because I was about to fucking kill myself. Do you have any idea what its like to have to try and have the courage NOT to kill myself? I don't care about the pain, all I can think about if what a huge relief it would be. The only reason why I havent done it is because I tried in december of 07 and thats when I found god...so now every time i feel that overwhelming feeling of just wanting to end it all I look for ways out, even if its something stupid like posting on a forum hoping that someone will say the right thing that will help me through this. And yes It is an addiction, I'm not able to just stop..but just like you said you will never be able to understand that.

Brandon, this suppose to be a place where people can get advice and talk about their problems without getting judged, thats a pretty big judgement to say shes "like an addict very weak" and saying this thread seems like a cry for sympathy

You even said yourself, you've never gone through that, so you shouldnt judge

And 4 1/2 years is a LONG time to simply "become stronger" and stop, its really not as simple as that
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Anyways, im very sorry to hear that. Just think of all the things that have made a turn for the worse since you started, and know that if you DO manage to stop, all of that will get better again

I know its not even close to what your going through, but i was SUCH a coca cola addict, i used to go through like 4 cans a day, then i thought how much better it would be without acne, without gross teeth,lose a few pounds, etc. Then i just simply stopped, because i really wanted good teeth and to be acne free, and now i feel WAY better then before, and i also have an extra 5$ a day im saving by not drinking coke

This may not work for you, just something that worked for me (and on something alot less serious)

And i have to agree with remo if your doing it because you think your to fat or something, youve got it the wrong way around, because many of my friends (and me) would much rather go out with a "full figured healthy women" then the "super skinny supermodel types"

Im trying not to be a hypocrite, because ive never gone through this myself either, so I really have no clue what your going through, just my opinion that will hopefully help a bit

You can also do exercise that dont involve your legs too, its not much, but im doing like 50 sit-ups a day, and a good amount of weight lifting, because I also messed up my legs too

I hope you get through it ok!

I'm not going to sympathize for you to make you feel better if you fucks underst and I'm helping her realize what she does is no good and she needs to better herself I am helping but in a harsh way people might hate me for this but frick I am right it works. Don't pity yourself



This is not normal of me to get mad, so I hope some one knows what i mean..

Brandon wrote:

I'm not going to sympathize for you to make you feel better if you fucks underst and I'm helping her realize what she does is no good and she needs to better herself I am helping but in a harsh way people might hate me for this but frick I am right it works. Don't pity yourself



This is not normal of me to get mad, so I hope some one knows what i mean..

im sorry you an idiot brandon?

i mean i got a friend who is all out stupid but even he knows when to shut up and try to help someone.....


sorry sorry bout that but its true.....

Fine I'll shut up but don't insult me

Brandon wrote:

Fine I'll shut up but don't insult me

im sorry dude but still.....sorry

brandon- Obviously you either did not read my first post or you are just an idiot. Why would I come to a forum for help and suggestions if I thought the vomiting was good for me? I said I was bulimic...remember? Please do not reply, you have proved to ALL of us your inability to understand psychological disorders. Don't pity myself? omg you are a joke. I can only hope that you are not giving your wonderful advice to others on this forum..if you are please stop..I fear that they might actually take you seriously. Its people like you i truly feel sorry for..people who don't have a conscience.

well i dont know if this will help but look at thee link to see if anything will or can help
for the shin thing

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jg79mQqiacM